Saturday, June 28, 2008

Ingenuous != Ingenious

Wow, I'm so proud of today's run. And I'm so ticked off at myself, because I forgot to bring my watch, so I couldn't time it! I'm almost positive, though, that I beat my last time by at least a minute! A lot less walking today, and afterwards, I had enough energy that I was able to jog halfway home. (The last half, of course... I did need to catch my breath, after all.)

I woke up this morning in a really grouchy mood. Again. I guess I've been running short on patience lately. Anyway, I was tired and grumpy, and my head hurt, and my voice was only working intermittently all the way until lunch. Then I went home and started digging through my fridge and found a double-size Monster Khaos energy drink we found in a room about six months ago. Rye had given it to me, telling me to give it to my piano students right before their parents came to pick them up. Of course, I never did, so it was still sitting in my fridge, waiting for an opportunity to be consumed. Well, I was feeling pretty miserable, and I was still half-asleep, and it was noon, so I drank it for lunch. Technically two servings, but meh.

Apparently, I was very funny. I didn't really feel any more energetic, and I couldn't even sense the "buzz" people talk about. But even I could tell that I was talking a lot more and making a lot less sense. I acted like a talkative drunk, including tripping on the steps and making really stupid jokes and giggling hysterically at them. Well, at least everyone was amused. And I felt quite a bit more cheerful.

I'm pretty sure it was wearing off by the time work ended. I never did feel the crash people say you get when you come off a sugar high (or caffeine, or whatever it is). Actually, this is the third time I've had an energy drink, and I've never crashed afterwards. Maybe I just never had enough! Yeah, that's it! Next time, I'll drink twice as much! (That was a joke, by the way.)

Anywho, afterwards, I went to the Packs' house. Cindy agreed to feed me dinner and cut my hair in return for my watching the kids Thursday and Friday. It was an interesting evening.... They'd bought a wood stove in Anchorage, so Rob and his brother (whose name escapes me) were installing it. There was stuff scattered all over the living room and kitchen, dust, stone tiles, mortar, and various other little bits of things everywhere. Cindy had bought pizza, and we didn't even actually eat an organized meal. I ate sitting on the couch, trying to keep the dogs from stealing my pizza from off my plate, while Kamryn begged me to come to her room and watch her turn somersaults and Noah sat behind me, sticking his feet in my face while I tried to eat.

Kamryn and Noah's cousins, Rhett and Sequoia, were there too. Rhett stole my hat and ran outside and we ended up having a full-fledged six-way war in the yard. By the way, the entire yard is nothing but gravel. And by gravel, I mean rocks ranging in size from your typical gravel-size rock to rocks the size of basketballs. Of course, Kamryn and Noah ended up picking up the rocks and throwing them, and I had to pull Noah and Sequoia off the roof of my car. But it was still fun. Even Kodie joined in, trying to bite my kneecaps off while I wrestled Rhett to the ground for the fourteenth time. Unfortunately, I fell too hard one time and managed to rip a hole in yet another pair of pants. Blarg! Oh, I ripped a hole in my knee too, but that one mends itself, so I don't worry about it too much.

So after Rhett and Sequoia left, we went inside, waiting for Cindy to get off the phone so she could trim my hair. I picked Noah up and he grabbed my chest, squeezed, and said, "Hey, is that a boob?"

I just about died! And his daddy gave him such a glare! Mwaha!

So then I got Noah talking about the wood stove. I asked him if he knew why the pipe went up into the ceiling, and he said that was how Santa got in.

"But Santa Claus is so fat! How do you think he fits in there?"

"He cuts his head open!"

"He does? That must hurt. Do his reindeer fix his head afterwards?"

"No. He comes into the house and then I cut his head open too with my baseball bat and he bleeds!"

What... a strange... kid....

Oh man... the best part of baby-sitting the kids on Friday, by the way, was when we were playing Red Light Green Light. Kamryn was calling the lights, so she stood against one wall, and Noah picked up a toy and stood against the other wall. "Green light!" Kamryn yelled, and then ran down the hall shrieking as Noah revved the toy chainsaw and chased her down the hall, yelling like a madman!

Anyway, Cindy did a great job trimming my hair! Even I can't tell it was cut except that it's soft all the way to the ends again, instead of the last two inches feeling like straw. Yeah... I know... I got two inches of hair cut off and can't tell a difference. What can I say? Guess I am my daddy's daughter after all. Mwaha!

That's all for now. Sleepytime for the Lint Monkey. Toodles!

This post has been brought to you by the word ingenuous.

Thursday, June 26, 2008


Two days ago, I ran a mile. This morning, I could still barely get out of bed. My calves felt like they were going to explode if I tried to move them.

And yet, I ran another mile today. I think today's mile was slower. I blame the fact that I still hadn't recovered from last time. Anyway, today, I made it in 9:59:24. Less than a second shy of ten minutes.

Theoretically, I'll run a mile every two days until I can manage to run it without wanting to throw up by the time I'm done. At that point, I'll start running five laps instead of four. Maybe, just maybe, I'll be in semi-decent shape by the time school starts.

Then again, knowing me, I'll forget all about it within a week. I never was very good at making goals and sticking with them. The only goal I remember really insisting on carrying through with was finding the end of a tunnel in Nutty Putty Caves. My first time going through it, I went alone because my group was tired, and I very nearly went insane trying to find the end. The tunnel kept going and going, getting smaller and smaller. Every time I thought I saw the end, I would reach it and realize the tunnel kept going, getting still smaller. I couldn't even bring my arms to my sides anymore, and no matter how loud I screamed, my group couldn't hear me because I was so far away, and the rocks swallowed my cries. It was the first time I'd ever felt claustrophobic, and, long story short, I gave up trying to find the end and just threw myself backwards as fast as I could go, trying to get back to my group. After that, I was absolutely bound and determined to go back to that cave and find the end of that tunnel.

Back to my original point, though. I don't know if that really counts as a goal so much as just proving I'm not a coward.

I'm baby-sitting the Pack kids tonight and tomorrow while the parents go to Anchorage. And I guess I'm bringing them with me to the doctor's office tomorrow too, because I have to get a Tuberculosis test to apply for housing in Fairbanks for this fall. Um. I'm nervous. I'm so terrified of needles that when I got my wisdom teeth taken out, they had to actually strap me down to the chair to give me the IV. If I have Kamryn and Noah with me, I can't show them I'm scared of needles, though. Boo. Guess that'll be good for me. I hate things that are good for me.

I've been working on keeping a straight face lately. Spider and I were talking the other day, and she told me dramatically that when she was four years old, her father had her scrubbing the showers, and when she said she couldn't reach the high parts, he told her to get a chair. I looked at her and said, "When I was four years old, my siblings and I were fighting each other to the death over scraps of food." It would have been hilariously funny if I could have managed to say it with a straight face! But this is me. I was falling over myself laughing as I said it. Crap. I'd be so much funnier if I didn't laugh so easily. Ironic, isn't it? (Spider = Emmelie, in case I never mentioned that, by the way.) So recently, I've been practicing saying my witty comments over and over at work, trying to say them with a straight face. My coworkers and I will just repeat funny comments and we'll take turns saying it until one of us can say it without smirking. So far, I always lose. Boo.

Anyway, gotta go take care of the little monsters. Toodles!

This post has been brought to you by the word jocose.

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Your turn to think

There are many things you should never know your mother has, thought Lindsey. And an alligator pit is one of them. It was about twenty feet in diameter, and Lindsey had no idea how deep it was. There were four alligators in the bottom, which Lindsey could only assume would be enormous when viewed up close. But she tried not to think about it. Their sharp teeth, their scaly hides, their dead-looking eyes, or the way she had seen them swallow their food the one time she had consented to watching her mother feed them.

But what can you do? she wondered. She could drop a stick of dynamite into the pit, she supposed. But where would a twelve-year-old girl get a stick of dynamite? "Wouldn't work," she said aloud.


Halt! No, this isn't a real story. I randomly wrote it out to make a point about internal conversations like this. Notice she's thinking to herself, the author is narrating, and she's talking to herself out loud. Did scenes like this ever bother anyone else? Well, I can't really say they bother me, I guess. I mean, it works. The reader gets the information they need, and they get it in conversation form, which is nice and doesn't require a personality-killing conversation or the introduction of an extra character for the sole purpose of explaining about, in this case, the alligator pit. It transmits the information better than just saying "Lindsey's mother had an alligator pit and Lindsey was scared of it." So I guess it's not necessarily that bad. But I still don't think highly of the method. It makes the story less believable because seriously, who thinks like that?

Anyone else have any thoughts?

Sunday, June 22, 2008


Mom requested I write a children's story about her new stuffed animal. It looks like a green cow with a pink nose, belly, and horns and red and yellow polka dots. Blogger's not being nice to me right now, so if you want a picture, you'll have to head over to her blog to check it out.

My problem is, I don't know how the story ends, so I need your help, dear readers, to tell me what happens so I can finish the story.


If you asked any kid at Clow Elementary School who the weirdest kid was, the kid would have said Mooky. It wasn't enough that Mooky was a pink and green cow with polka dots. Mooky's eyes pointed in different directions. Mooky always got his colors mixed up. And Mooky was very very clumsy. Mooky tried to be friendly, but he got teased a lot, and he was very sensitive.

One day, during recess, the kids started a game of Red Rover, Red Rover. Mooky watched for a few minutes, then tapped a girl named Tilly on the shoulder. "Um... excuse me..." he said hesitantly.

"What do you want?" she asked.

"Can I play too, please?" Mooky asked.

"Oh okay," Tilly said. She took his hand and yelled, "Red Rover, Red Rover, send Eddie right over!"

Eddie ran from the other team and sprinted right towards Tilly's and Mooky's clasped hands. Mooky held her hand really really tight as Eddie crashed into their hands. Because he didn't let go, Eddie joined their side.

Tilly smiled at him. "Good job, Mooky," she said. "Now you get to yell."

Mooky took a deep breath to yell, and Tilly shook him. "No, not yet! The other team gets to go first! ...Of course."

"Oh." He waited while the other team yelled for Samantha to come over. She ran and broke through the other team's hands, so she took Will and came back to Mooky's team.

"Okay, now yell," said Tilly.

Mooky took a deep breath and yelled, "Green Rover, Blue Rover..." and then stopped because everyone was laughing. "What?" he asked, his ears drooping sadly.

"Red!" said Tilly. "You weirdo, it's Red Rover!"

Mooky dropped his head. "I'm not a weirdo."

"Oh yeah?" said Tilly. "Say it again. Red Rover."

Mooky sighed and took another deep breath to yell again, "Gray Rover, Pink Rover..."

Half the team collapsed to the ground, they were laughing so hard. The other half the team just rolled their eyes. "Weirdo," said Tilly. Mooky cried and ran away.


I don't know what happens next. Or rather, I'm not sure how it happens. Ideas?

Friday, June 20, 2008


Searching for housing for this fall is weird. I'm a coward and don't want to get the required shots to live on campus, so I'm looking for roommates off campus. It hadn't occurred to me that guys and girls could and would be housing together. Not like sharing a bedroom, necessarily, but apparently it's not a big deal when guys and girls share a house or apartment. This concept is a little bit different for me, and I'm trying to decide whether or not I have a moral problem with it. I mean, as long as the guys are respectful enough to stay out of my pants, it wouldn't be too different from having brothers, I guess. I do know I'd be a bit uncomfortable having only one roommate, and having said roommate be male. ...But wow, in Utah, any housing over 300 dollars a month seemed expensive. In Fairbanks, 600 a month seems cheap.

Rye and Tomtom and I went to Anchorage today. I found a pair of sunglasses designed to fit over prescription glasses that actually looks only slightly retarded! I'm pretty excited, because I haven't worn sunglasses since I was about twelve. If I had contacts, I would probably never take sunglasses off. I don't exactly have beautiful eyes, and anyway, sunglasses are cool. And maybe I would seem a bit less awkward if people couldn't see my eyes darting around nervously all the time or the blank expression on my face when people mention things like Adam Sandler and James Earl Jones. According to Emmelie, I'm just a generally awkward-seeming person. That's depressingly accurate, too. Boo.

We were in Bed Bath and Beyond today, and I saw an oven mitt. It was a rubbery one that was curled so you kind of made a duck with your hands to use it. The first time my sister and I went into a Bed Bath and Beyond, we drove Mom nuts by saying "Oven mitt!" and opening and closing our hands like we were wearing the oven mitt. So I reminisced a little, and then our song came on the radio. "Gimme the beat, boys, and free my soul, I wanna get lost in rock and roll and drift away!"

Ha, I miss my sister sometimes. Even if she is boy-crazy.

I actually miss Katy and Tom and Rusty a lot lately, too. Emmelie has a few habits that remind me forcibly of Rusty sometimes. For example, she uses the phrase "That makes my heart smile!" and she calls me "dear," just like Rusty used to. She's also almost constantly happy, like Rusty, and she's an actor. Like Rusty. If he were here, Rusty would adore her. I keep expecting to hear the echoing "Joyeux!" whenever I say "Joyous!!!"

I guess what I miss the most is people who would be entertained by my stories instead of shrugging them off as insignificant or topping them. For example, the other day, I caught a fly from midair with a pair of tweezers. It was amazing, and made an awesome story! But it seems like everyone around here that I tell the story to just goes, "That's nice." Le sigh. I used to think I was a pretty good storyteller.

Hm, I guess I'm moping now. Ah well, I'll shut up, then. Toodles! Today's post has been brought to you by the word joyeux. That's French. It means joyous.

Thursday, June 19, 2008

Of jugglers and Christians

Zoh my gosh zoh my gosh zoh my gosh, I'm so excited!

I woke up to a phone call from a lady named Cindy from the UAF Academic Center. We were supposed to have a phone appointment at one, but apparently she had a meeting to go to, so she called earlier. Glad she told me, because I was really disoriented. "What? I slept till one? Sheesh, am I getting mono again or something?"

Anyway, apparently some of my credits aren't transferring very smoothly, like science. For core requirements, I'm supposed to take two four-credit science classes. Well, I've taken two three-credit science classes. (Three if you count Philosophy as a science, but apparently that's actually a "social science" which isn't the same thing.) Also, since I took Elang classes instead of Linguistics classes, they're not transferring right even though they're exactly the same thing, just with a different name. But Cindy says once I get to UAF, I can sit down with someone and work it all out and it'll all be good. Worst case scenario: Four semesters instead of three. Not too terrible, I guess.

Apparently, they're not really big into Latin, so I still have to take another semester of Latin, but it's a correspondence class, and I go in to the teacher once a week and get one-on-one tutoring for a bit. Intense! Also, funny thing, it's a three-credit class. Weird! Foreign languages have always been four credits!

So I'm taking Latin, morphology, and three core requirements: ethics, public speaking, and advanced writing. Then I asked the lady if UAF had anything like Leading Edge. She said "Why yes, you're talking to the right person, because I'm in charge of it! It's called Icebox." I told her about the work I'd done at Leading Edge and she said, "Oh, that's it, then. We need you. You have no choice now, you're helping us." Yay! I liked her a lot; she knew the answer to every question I asked her, including questions about residency status and juggling club.

That's what got me so excited, actually. Juggling club! WOOT! The club is called Gravity Works, "dropping things on the floor since 1993." The coolest thing ever, though, is... they meet three times a week!! Zoh my gosh, that's so awesome! YJuggle only met once a week, and for the last three semesters at BYU, I couldn't go because Leading Edge overlapped it! (I checked; Icebox doesn't meet at the same time as Gravity Works.) Three times a week, that's so epic!! And you know what else? They get to juggle knives and fire!!! Fire's not allowed on BYU campus. Zooooh my gosh!

Cindy told me she started a horse club a while back too. Horses! On a college campus! What the heck? I need to ask about that too--I love horses!

Yeah yeah yeah, I know, I won't make the same mistake I made my first semester at BYU and join so many clubs that I fail all my classes. And hey, I didn't fail them all... I just got lower grades than I'd anticipated.

Anyway, so now I'm totally stoked for school. Cindy sounded really nice, she said the teachers I have are really good, and I'm so excited for juggling club I can't even stand it! And I'm finally allowed to start thinking again! Finally, people who actually appreciate it when I think differently than everyone else!

Okay, calming down now. Calming... I'm calm.... Someone told me once that you should avoid extreme highs like getting super happy or super excited because then you're subject to extreme lows like severe depression. I think that's a little silly, personally. Besides, being happy is good for you. If you don't believe me, you should try it. ;)

Changing subjects! I went with Tyler to his church thing yesterday. Worship service, I guess it was? They meet both Sundays and Wednesday evenings and I think Tyler's trying to convert me. He says "I'm not trying to convert you, it's entirely up to you." Whatever. He's trying to convert me. Anyway, it was, quite frankly, a little terrifying. Can you say "fanatics"?

There were only about half a dozen people there. We started off by singing a song. And by "singing a song," I don't mean someone played the piano and we sang from a hymnbook. I mean they put a Gospel song on the stereo, complete with guitars and drums and everything, and sang along. I didn't know the words, so they handed me a sheet with just the words written out (sloppily, with about thirty typos per song) and no notes or anything so I could read along. They told me to "focus on the words." So I read over the words. Every single song was basically "Yay Jesus, praise Jesus, you're so amazing, woohoo, go you, I love you so much, love love Jesus Jesus." While they sang, some of them stood up, clapped their hands, waved their arms, and swayed back and forth. That was weird enough, but halfway through the first song, people started chanting "Yes Lord" "That's right Lord" "Thank you Lord" "Oh Christ Jesus" and so on. It was a little eerie. They closed their eyes and the lady giving the lesson said what I assume would be the opening prayer while the song was still playing. The whole time, everyone chanted along in a low murmur "Yes Lord" "Yes Jesus" "That's right" "Be with us, Lord" "yessss.... yessss..." "Please Lord."

The lesson was about how we need to open our hearts and be ourselves because God loves us just the way we are and he's always with us so we can't be afraid of anything. Oh Jesus Jesus.

Then they turned the music back on and swayed and clapped and sang five more songs while chanting along. Each song was between five and ten minutes of "We love Jesus, oh praise Jesus." They turned it off and the lady talked for a few more minutes, bearing testimony, I think, then said "Let's sing that last song again." I managed to avoid that by starting to ask questions. I tried very hard to not ask questions that made it sound like I was challenging them, but unfortunately, I instead came across like I was investigating and interested in converting and "being saved." My main question was "What do you have to do to get into heaven?" The answer, just as I had expected was "All you have to do is confess Jesus as your Lord and Savior and open your heart to him." I think that's ridiculous, frankly. Any "fair and loving God" wouldn't base your eternal salvation on whether or not you believe in someone you may not have ever even heard of. "Oh no," the lady said, "God makes sure everyone on the earth has a chance to hear about him and accept him." I don't believe it.

Another thing that I wasn't impressed with was the fact that they said everything in the world is a lie except the Bible. Evolution is a lie. The world was made in seven days, God made Adam, he ate the forbidden fruit, we're all punished for that, we're all sinners, but God's so merciful he loves us anyway. Yes Jesus. But science is a lie. Most of history is a lie, unless it's the Bible. People are liars and want to separate us from Jesus. And by the way, this isn't a religion, it's a relationship. Oh Lord Jesus. And the answers to all my questions are in the Bible.

"How do you know the Bible is true?" I asked.

"You'll know it in your knower," the lady replied. "I would recommend you start with the book of John and work from there, and if you get frustrated or have a question, call someone and ask."

Then a lady came up behind me and put her hands on my shoulders, making me jump about a foot (I don't like people coming up behind me and touching me), and starting rubbing my back and shoulders and praying over me. And everyone chanted along. "Yes Jesus." "Thank you Jesus." "Answer her questions, Lord." "That's right." "Please Lord."

I asked a million questions and didn't really buy most of the answers. Finally, the lady in charge said it was time to go, and thanked me because I was the answer to her prayer, because just last week she had prayed for God to send her someone who was trying to find Him so she could show them the way to Him. Yes Jesus.

I successfully made it all the way home before cracking up. They were nice people, but zoh my gosh, I thought that kind of creepy fanaticism only really existed in movies and Alabama!

What really confused me, though, was that it felt very similar to how some of my LDS church meetings felt when people said "Oh, the spirit is so strong!" I guess I had sort of assumed that this "Spirit" was something that was only there when you were being Mormon. Maybe it was just the giving off of the feeling of sincerity, though, however kooky it seemed to me. I wonder if that "Spirit" is what makes people believe in religions, and if it's there in all of them. If that's the case, I wonder if there is any "true" religion, and if it even seriously matters which one you join as long as you're not hurting anyone else.

I believe in that which I can observe, that which can be proven, and that which makes logical sense to me. I also believe that dancing around and chanting makes no difference to what happens to your soul after you die. If there is a God and a heaven, or some kind of reward for the way you live your life, that it would be based on what you did with what you had, not what religion you decided to practice.

I've also decided that Mountain Dew Supernova tastes better than Mountain Dew Revolution. I haven't tried the third new flavor yet, but it's in my fridge for as soon as I finish the Revolution one.

This post has been brought to you by the word onomatopoeia.

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

You're all too happy

Okay, so I was a little disappointed with the comments to my last post. I mean, I'm glad you all had three things you easily thought of that made you happy, but I was thinking of more general things. Id est, things that don't have the word "my" in front. I think everyone but Triscuits listed things they own.

Basically, I was thinking things that you randomly see around sometimes and smile and go "Hey, that makes me smile." Like every time I see a PT Cruiser, it makes me smile because they're just so cool. And any time I see Pokemon cards, I smile because hey, I used to collect those! So let's try again, and this time, you're not allowed to say something you own or even see almost every day.

1) Pogo sticks
2) Stuffed animals
3) Motorcycles

PS - Karen, Kathy, if you guys still read my blog, you aren't exempt from this. :P

Monday, June 16, 2008

Smile! Life is funny

Emmelie and I were horsing around too much at work today, and I threw her to the ground. I meant to throw her gently, the way we learned in karate, but I didn't realize she was standing with her legs crossed, so she kind of splatted. She scraped her knee up and called me a little whore, and I felt really bad. Especially when she rolled up her pants leg and I saw her knee. It was really pretty, actually. It was bleeding a little and it'll be dark purple and black in a day or two. One of those bleeding-under-the-skin kind of things, about the size of a quarter. So I took her to Laundry and I got her Neosporin and a Band-aid, but Rye was there and totally freaked out about it. At first, I thought I was making a big deal about it by insisting we clean it and put antibiotic ointment on it before slapping on a Band-aid, but Rye pretty much flipped. Well, as much as Rye flips, anyway. He was mad at us for rough-housing, (which is understandable,) so now we're supposed to stop joking around, we're not allowed to run, skip, jump, laugh, wrestle, or touch each other unnecessarily. We're supposed to be sedate, and when we're knocking on doors for in-house, we're only allowed to have one person talking at a time. He went on about that for a bit and then had Emmelie fill out an accident report "in case she needs to go to the hospital later." Then when Steven and Lita came in, Rye repeated his whole lecture about being sedate and not running, jumping, skipping, laughing, et cetera. He sounded so much like my dad that I wanted to laugh at him.

Before you start to lecture, I realize and accept the fact that we were goofing off too much. I felt bad, and I'm glad I didn't hurt her too badly, and I will be more careful in the future. ...But now I'm not allowed to run anymore, and I always run everywhere I go on the resort. I love running! Not only does it get you where you need to go faster, but it's really stress-relieving. I'm not talking distance-running, I'm talking about sprinting. Bursts of energy. That kind of thing.

Changing the subject, I'm most distressed. I think Rusty's off his mission, but I'm not sure because the dirty rotten lousy warped lazy negligent son of a snothead hasn't written to me in a year, so I don't know when he's getting off his mission. I think if I actually got a letter from him, I would have a heart attack and drop dead on the spot. I'm pretty sure he's off his mission, or if he's not off, he should be in a month or so. I think. But if he is off, I don't know where he is, or if he has his cell phone back, or if he uses the same e-mail address or what. In other words, I don't know how to contact him. That sucks.

This is a mildly depressing post. I know! Let's have a Comment Party! Everyone who reads this, list in a comment three material things that make you smile. That means you can't say "My family" or "Being in such and such a place" or "Doing this" or "When people..." Three material things. They don't even have to be your top three.

1) Mom's angel food cake (no one can make it like Mom)
2) PT Cruisers
3) Pokemon cards

Sunday, June 15, 2008


I broke another ponytail holder today. That's the second one in a week. Those things are so cheaply made. Either that or it's a sign that I should cut my hair short again.

Rye gave me a CD with about a hundred Final Fantasy songs. I came home and listened to some of them and ZOH MY GOSH, they're amazing!!! We're talking orchestral pieces that shame anything I ever played in any band or orchestra with the possible exception of Abram's Pursuit. Yayayayay!

Today was a funny day. Zac and Steven are a riot!

I will now be going to sleep. This post has been brought to you by the word azure. Azure. Azuuuuuuure. Teehee.

Saturday, June 14, 2008

Zac, Rye, Tyler, and BYU... hmmm...

I walked in on a naked man and raped Zac at work today.

Not really. I think the guy was just shirtless, but he was hiding behind the door anyway. And later in the day, Zac picked up some moss and put it in my bag (the one we carry around coffee, cups, and sugar in), so I took out the moss and tried to put it down the back of Zac's shirt. We ended up wrestling on the bed, and Zac started yelling "Rape! Rape! Help, Steven, she's raping me!" Later on, I managed to get the moss down the back of his shirt, so when we went into the next room, he actually took off his shirt and shook it out. Holy crap, he's hot! Shame he's got a girlfriend. (I'm mostly just kidding.)

Of course, when we told Beth that I had raped Zac, she wanted to know who was on top. (That was me, because I'm such a great wrestler. I'm actually an Australian ninja. They're better than the normal kind of ninja because a good ninja is never detected. Have you ever heard of an Australian ninja? Probably not, because we're never seen. We're that good.

Man, if my parents knew half the things we get up to at work, I think they would disown me. Aside from the pickles, the manpillows, and the kitchen tables (don't ask. On all three counts. Seriously), we're constantly threatening to kill each other, stripping in front of groups of people, and calling each other Jews, rapists, homosexuals, and pedophiles. That's not counting the dirty jokes we make and the amount of time we spend beating each other up and/or hitting on each other. Loads of fun! :D

Okay, okay, so except for Zac taking off his shirt today, "stripping" refers to taking the dirty sheets and towels out of the room to speed up the group that comes behind to clean it, but it's not as funny if you know that.

I was watching Appleseed in Rye and Tom's room yesterday, and when it ended, Rye, who was still in his pajama bottoms, said, "Okay, Tom and I are going to go to the grill and get some food before we watch the sequel, which necessitates you standing outside in the hall for a few minutes...."

Tom interrupted him and said, "What, she can't wait in here? It's not like she's gonna steal anything."

Rye said, "Well, I was planning on taking off my pants--" at which point, I perked up and said "Ooh baby!" But I was joking. Really, I was totally joking! Ew ew ew, pantsless boss!

.....So anyway. I took my first two biology exams yesterday. Before I took the exams, I went over every single lesson at least four times. I practically had the first five chapters memorized, word for word. Went in to take the test and said "What the crap is this?" There were just enough questions from the reading that I can't say "Hey, this isn't the right text," but almost a quarter of the questions were un"question"ably not covered in the readings. Gay!

Did I mention just how irritating BYU Independent Study is, by the way? They said "Sorry, you're a college student, so you can't take your exams at the local high school or even proctored somewhere nearby, you have to take them at a certified testing center. Here's a list of the ones near you." The nearest one was in Anchorage. The website said it was fifty miles away. Fifty! Try a hundred and thirty! So I called them up and said "Hey, can you make some kind of exception for me?" and they said "Nope, sorry, no can do, because it's a college course." Well, that's gay. So I tried again a while later, hoping to talk to someone else. "Can you make some kind of exception? It says fifty, but I've clocked it on the car, it's a hundred and thirty, gas is almost five dollars a gallon, the roads are icy (they were, at the time), and I can't very well schedule days off to take the test because I'm on call at work for whenever they need me, which is nearly every day." "Nope, sorry, it's a college course. No exceptions." So I decided I'd at least put off taking the tests until summer, when I had scheduled days off, and when the roads wouldn't be icy. Then I reviewed all my lessons and called the testing center to ask if they would proctor the exam.

"Why yes," said the lady, "We do that all the time. Just give us your number and we'll call you when the test comes in and schedule a time to take it."

"Cool," said I. "Is there a fee?"

I was anticipating a fee, because the website had suggested there might be one. You know, five, ten, or maybe fifteen dollars. I can handle that. "Yes, there is a fee. Sixty dollars even."

SIXTY DOLLARS??? That's on TOP of the fifty dollars for gas to drive up to Anchorage and back! And I had to do that SIX TIMES!!! That's over six hundred dollars just to take a couple of stupid tests for courses I probably won't even get credit for!

What would you do in a situation like that? I did what any twenty-year-old girl would do: I called up my mommy and cried! My mommy, of course, took pity on me, and e-mailed the school. The next day, I got an e-mail saying "Oh yeah, your mommy says this is your situation. Of course we can make an exception, since the testing center is so far away. You can just take it at your local library. We put a note in your file about the exception. Let us know when you need the tests."

So I e-mailed them back and said "Thank you thank you thank you thank you! But when I went on your website to order the test, the library didn't show up as an option for where to order it. Do I have to e-mail you specially for every test, or do I call you up or what?"

I got an e-mail that was some pre-written response saying "To order a test, just go to this website and type in your course code blah blah blah, to order a test to be shipped overnight, call this number, blah blah blah. Thank you for your interest in BYU Independent Study blah blah I was written by a freaking machine with an oversized formality chip."

So I responded saying "Uh... thanks... but that doesn't answer my question because the library still isn't on the list of places to order the test to."

Response: "Oh yeah, because we made an exception, you can't order your tests off the website, you have to e-mail us for each test."

My reply: "Okay... in that case, I'd like to order my first biology midterm, course code is this number, thanks a lot."

Response: "We ordered both your first two midterms for you, since they have to be taken at the same time. In the future, it would be easier if you simply went to our website to order your tests."

So now apparently I have to e-mail them for each exam so that I can be told I'm supposed to order from the website instead even though I was also told I can't use the website. Bastards.

Oh well. Life is funny.

So, another funny story! At lunch today, someone actually came to visit me! It was Tyler, a guy who works in grounds who, I'm pretty sure, has at least a mild crush on me. He's a nice guy, and fairly cute, but he's a bit too religious for me to consider a serious relationship with. Of course, I have a bad habit of flirting with pretty much everyone. I enjoy flirting, but sometimes, I guess I lead people on and then they end up getting their feelings hurt when I have to tell them I was just playing and thought they were too. Kind of makes me feel like a jerk.

Anyway, so Tyler showed up to ask me to come to church with him on Wednesday nights. I guess it's a bit like an Institute class for non-denominational Christians. Of course, I jokingly accused him of trying to convert me to his religion so he could marry me, which he vehemently denied, but I agreed to go anyway. I think it'll prove entertaining, if nothing else. Maybe I could ask the teacher what the difference is between all the Protestant religions. I always wondered, but no one seems to actually know. Besides, it's not like I have much else to do. (That's not entirely true. Wednesday is Zul'Aman day, but we haven't actually gone since Arc went to Singapore.)

Tyler also called me "beautiful." That was weird. I get called "cute" often enough to believe it. I sometimes get called "pretty." I even occasionally get teasingly called "hot." But nobody calls me "beautiful." Hillary's beautiful. Nikki's beautiful. Melinda's beautiful. I'm cute. Big difference. But I appreciate the compliment anyway.

Then he asked why I always wear a hat and I told him it was because I'm bald, and the hat helps cover the edges of my wig. He actually believed me, too, which made me laugh so hard I about died. "Wait... really? Wow, it looks so real!"

It's amazing, the range of subjects I covered in this one blog post. This post has been brought to you by the word meandering.

Friday, June 13, 2008

Thursday, June 12, 2008

This is not a title

Life is funny. Laugh at it.

I took my car to No Sweatt Auto Shop after lunch today because something in the engine kept whirring when it wasn't supposed to, even after I turned the car off. I'd been unplugging the thing in the engine that was making the noise, but I wanted it fixed. I was also worried because my brakes have been catching periodically, and last time I was in Anchorage (six days ago), they made a really weird noise. Just once. But still enough to scare me.

So I took the car in, they said they'd look at it around 3:30, I walked home, and at 4:00, I got a phone call saying the thing making the noise was the ABS Hydraulic System. "A valve was stuck, so I tapped it and put it back where it belongs, and I'm 90% sure that fixed the problem." So I started celebrating that I didn't have to buy a new expensive part for my precious, and then, as if I wasn't thrilled enough, the guy added "It didn't even take five minutes to fix, so you don't owe us a penny." YAY!!! I could've kissed the guy. Really. Actually, he was really cute, so all the more reason to, right? Shame he told me this over the phone. Ah well. It wouldn't have worked out anyway. How am I supposed to stay happily single forever if I start hitting on attractive mechanics? I ask you!

Do you know what I find highly unfair? Guys with long, thick eyelashes. I joke with my friends that I can bat my eyelashes at them and get them to do anything I want them to, but in reality, I hardly even have eyelashes. They're thin and short and such a light color that you can hardly tell they're there. No no no, no way am I about to wear false eyelashes or mascara, but it makes me very jealous when boys walk around with the thick beautiful eyelashes I've always wanted. No, I'm not acting like a vain teenage girl! ...much. Terrace says guys genetically have prettier eyelashes than girls, which makes sense... except in cartoons, where sometimes the only way to tell a girl character from a guy character is that the girl characters have long eyelashes. How silly.

This reminds me that I've been meaning to go to the optometrist and get contacts so I can wear sunglasses.

So anyway, I was looking at my transferred credits and my religion credits didn't transfer at all, so I'm a junior again. On the plus side, almost all of my other credits transferred in such a way that I have almost exactly three 15-credit semesters left till I graduate. I figure I may as well stay in school through the summer and graduate in August. As Steven would say: "I'm stoked!"

The King tagged me, so now I have to make a list of 3 joys, 3 fears, 3 current obsessions/collections, and 3 random surprising facts about myself, then tag five other people. I wonder if simple lists suffice or if I'm supposed to elaborate on each item in each list the way the King did.

1. Frolicking in the rain or snow and then coming inside to dry off and get a cup of hot chocolate.
2. Impressing people. Music, magic tricks, juggling, being silly, whatever. It's good for your ego when people say "Oh wow, that's really cool that you can do that!"
3. Solving puzzles. (Go go 4-second Minesweeper!)

1. Talking on the phone. Hence why I haven't yet called the King and Queen to thank them for storing my crap for me and to tell them when I'm coming to pick it up. (sheepish)
2. Failure.
3. Being forgotten, particularly by people I consider close friends. (My best friend from high school doesn't even remember who I am anymore.)

Current obsessions/collections: (They have to be current? Phooey.)
1. Hats.
2. Books.
3. Tastes. Especially drinks and candy bars, but anything, really. Trying new things = win.

Random Surprising Facts:
1. When my friends first started playing Dungeons and Dragons, I refused to play.
2. I have a teddy bear named Teddy. (Don't ask.)
3. My first word was "Poopyface," and my first sentence was "Bye, Mom, I'm going to the mall!"

Hmmm, who to tag. Captain Jolli, Terrace, and Dad. I'd tag Dubby and Bopnopper too, but they've already been tagged, and anyway, I think the theme here is the number three, so I'm altering the rules to stick with it.

Today's post has been brought to you by the word coetaneous, because I've decided I like that word.

Wednesday, June 11, 2008


Today marks my first time ever actually blowing up a hot dog in the microwave. Pretty awesome.

My car's broken again. This time it wasn't my fault, though. I think it's just old and the part needs to be replaced. Anyway, I'm taking it in to an actual auto shop tomorrow, I think, because I'm pretty sure it's my brakes, and I absolutely don't want those going out on me. Dang, I wish I knew more about cars.

Oh well. What else? Ha, I had the weirdest conversation with a guest the other day....

Lint Monkey: Hallo, housekeeping, can we get you anything?
Crazy Lady: Um, no, actually, I think we're fine. We don't need anything.
LM: All right then, you guys have a great day!
Other Man: *walks up* Hey, you! Housekeeper!
LM: Yes?
OM: I've got a question for you!
CL: *slaps him* Oh, you hush!
OM: When you're in a cabin with several other people, and you go to use the bathroom, and the bathroom door is shut, what's the first thing you do before you walk into the bathroom?
LM: Um... knock...?
OM: Ha! There! You see?
CL: *slaps him again* Oh hush, you should've locked the door! *to us* When you're in a cabin with a group of people and you go to use the bathroom, do you lock the door or not?
LM: Yes... I lock it...
CL: Ha! There, you see? You should have locked it!
OM: *turns to me, Emmelie, Zac, and Steven* How old are you guys?
Em: Sixteen.
LM: Twenty.
Zac, Steven: *cower*
OM: You're forty? Wow, you don't look a day over fifteen!
LM: Not forty, twenty.
OM: Oh, twenty, twenty, of course, yes. Well, you listen to me, and listen well. Never get married! *puts his arm around Crazy Lady* This crazy lady and I can't stand each other! And we've only been putting up with each other for a couple of days. We're not actually even married. I mean, I dated her for a few weeks after we graduated high school. And now I thank God every single day for letting me marry someone who wasn't her.
CL: *slaps him, laughs, and goes back inside*
Saint Robert: Excuse me... *pushes past OM and heads for the car*
OM: Ah, there! See that guy? That man over there is Saint Robert. We call him Saint Robert because he's married to the Crazy Lady. I don't know how he does it. He's in line to be the next pope!
SR: *smirk*

I don't actually remember the rest of the conversation. I think we pretty much just fell over laughing till we died and woke up in the next room still doing in-house. Good thing we were still a little alive or Rye would have killed us for dying at work. I hate it when he does that. Rather excruciating.

I'm wearing dirty socks. That's a sign I need to do laundry. Man, I wish I had my own house with my own washing machine so I didn't have to make three+ trips just to clean my socks.

Which reminds me. In response to your comments to my dream house...

> > First, regarding the Fat Bear's comment about the grand piano: In a large area like a gym or a concert hall, grand pianos are wonderful. In a house, they take up too much space to be worth the sound difference. Having a grand piano sitting in the middle of the room because it doesn't actually fit well against a wall or in a corner is annoying enough that it overbalances the slight sound quality difference. In my not-so-humble opinion, at least. Furthermore, I was raised on uprights and actually almost prefer the sound of a good upright.

> > Second, to Terrace's comment: Thank you. I thought of it myself. :P

> > Third, replying to Old Man's comment regarding circulation, temperature gradients, ultraviolet exposure, proliferation, deterioration, et cetera: I'm tempted to say "Huh?" But that sends the implication that I didn't comprehend or appreciate the scientific espials you've detected and disclosed. While I appreciate your scrutiny, I nevertheless regard it as obiter dicta because a fantastic domicile ("fantastic," of course, connoting the traditional "related to fantasy" and not the coetaneous vernacular "remarkable") is not necessarily subject to the scientific laws of this dimension. Put simply, if I want to, I can put the fireplace on reverse and use it as a freezer, and there ain't nuttin' you can do about it. I love you too, Daddy.

> > And in response to the King's comment: The RPG room! Crikey, I knew I was forgetting something! Thanks! The RPG room will be in the basement, which will be accessible by climbing wall (which will extend to the basement now) and by a door leading outside. The door that leads outside will be underground and there will be a ramp leading up to ground level. But not just any ramp. There'll be a stone... thingy... around it shaped like a dragon's head, so when you walk down the ramp and into the door, it'll look like you're walking into a dragon's mouth and down his throat. Kind of. It'll be made of black stone, and the fangs will look like black stalagmites and stalactites. Plus, there'll be red lighting for super-cool special effects. Red lights for its eyes and some down towards the back of his "throat" too, so when you look into it, it looks like you can see the fire in its belly. How cool is that? The basement itself will be a big room made of stone, and the furniture will be carved into it. I'm thinking black stone, like obsidian or maybe black marble. Just because that's cool. But that's almost overkill. I mean, I bet Dark Iron Dwarves would like it, but adventurers aren't usually Dark Iron Dwarves. Going along with the black stone, though, there would be stalagmites and stalactites and possibly something like a hologram projector making it look like the ceiling over the table is melting and about to drip lava onto the players. Heck, maybe some lava pits around the room too. And a huge two-handed battle-axe hanging on the wall near where the DM sits.

The problem is, cool as that would be, it's a little dark, even for me. I suppose I could just go with a big well-lit room with white walls and fluorescent lights, which would be a funny contrast to the dragonmouth entrance. Plus, I've always been a fan of well-lit rooms. I'm convinced there's something about them that helps people kind of relax. Which leads me to my second idea that, unfortunately, requires an entirely different house. It would be kind of one story, but kind of two stories. Allow me to elaborate.

You walk in the front door and find yourself in a hallway. There's a door to your right that's just a coat room, a door in front of you, and a hallway leading left. You put your coat in the closet and if there weren't any coats in the closet, you'd see another door on the other side of the closet. The other door leads to the hallway leading to the right. It's kind of hard describing this without an illustration. You can take the hallway left fifteen feet and the left wall will continue going, but the right wall will then turn and it will leave you in the corner of a big room. Think living room. Piano, foosball table, air hockey... television and Playstation and stuff, I guess... whatever. And a few scattered bookshelves. Got to have a place to store my books. Always. Anyway, you turn right to walk through this room, reach the far side, and turn right again to find the door to the kitchen. You go in and it's your typical kitchen because I haven't thought much about it so far. Go through another door, pass a bathroom on your left, pass a storage closet on your left, and turn right to reach the Lint Monkey's bedroom and office and workshop et cetera.
Haven't thought too much about this area either, really. Pass through that, turn right again, go down the hallway, go through the back of the coat room, and you're back in the main entryway. But the whole idea for the house is that it's got a big empty square in the middle. Only it's not really empty. Because there's another room there, it's just weird. See, in that big area in the middle, there's a room that's shaped like a big two- or three-story oak tree. You go through the door across from the front door and go down under the tree, then go up the trunk from the inside until you get to the area that would be the heart of tree, in the middle of the branches and leaves. That's the role-playing room. Several windows looking out, but the "leaves" overshadow it enough to protect it from the sun (just for you, Dad). Basically, think elfish thoughts for this room and there you have it.

But now I think about it, I don't like how at nighttime, you'd practically be on a glowing pedestal yelling "LOOK AT ME, I'M PRETENDING TO BE AN ELF!" I mean, it's different if you're in a basement that looks like a dragon's lair, but... rawr. Back to the drawing board.

I guess I could always just role-play in the living room of my original dream house.

This post has been brought to you by the word shrug. Because it's just a cool-sounding word.

Too Early for Exclamation Marks

I figure I haven't updated in days, and I've got twenty minutes till work now. May as well update real quick.

I didn't want to announce this until it was official, but I got the acceptance letter yesterday. I'm going to UAF this fall. This isn't because I'm avoiding BYU, honest. It's because I can't get back in to BYU. Apparently, because I was gone for more than one semester, they actually removed me from the school roster, so when I sent in my ecclesiastical endorsement I worked so hard to get this winter (heh), they just threw it away because I wasn't a student anymore. When I couldn't register, I called and asked about it and they said "Oh yeah. You're not a student anymore, so you'll have to reapply to the school as a returning student. Um... by the way, the application deadline was a month and a half ago." Blah. Well, I tried anyway, got in the whole application except for the part where you have to have an interview with the bishop and the stake president and get them to sign the form (not the ecclesiastical endorsement, but a different one), read the form and said "Drat. I can't sign this." The part where you had to sign said, among other things, that I promised I had been regularly attending my church meetings and would continue to do so. And the truth of the matter is, I haven't been going. So I met with the bishop anyway, told him my dilemma, and he looked at it and said "I can't sign this either."

So until such time as I start regularly attending church again, I can't go back to BYU. Hence why I'm going to UAF instead. The linguistics degree is actually fairly close to my English Language degree. And if the credits don't transfer right, I can always change my major to physics. ;) I'm looking forward to getting back to classes, being around kids my age, and joining juggling club (if I can find out where and when it meets).

If you think I don't seem excited, it's mostly because it's too early in the morning to use exclamation marks. Honest.

I was reading A Brief History of Time last night, got tired of pacing, so I lay down on my bed to read the book. Then I fell asleep. Zoh my gosh, imagine that. But it was really cool, because I learned about the ether which doesn't exist that people invented for religious reasons and how Einstein pointed out that all their complicated theories about how light travels could be disposed of if they simply gave up the concept of absolute time, and I learned that the faster something travels, the more energy it takes to make it go faster and why, and I learned exactly why it's impossible to go faster than the speed of light, and I realized that if it were possible to go faster than light, we could travel through time because of the future light cone. And stuff. Anyway, it was really exciting, and I was just about jumping up and down when I was reading it. Until my feet started hurting.

Now I should go put on my shoes and get to work, because I only have five minutes left. Toodles!

Saturday, June 7, 2008

Dream house

With a little prompting from Suthana, I spent some time at work today speculating about what my Dream House would be like. The plans are still a little rough, but here's what I've got so far.

First of all, this is assuming I live alone (any pets not included). It'd be a fairly small house. Two stories, but each story would be fairly small. I'm thinking it'll be built of stones and logs. Probably front and back would be logs and the sides would be stone. I'm actually not sure if you can do that or not, though, so that part is subject to change.

For the purposes of this description, we'll assume the front door is facing south, okiedokie? The ground floor would have three rooms. Well, kind of four, but the living room and kitchen would be sort of open to each other. When you walk in the front door (middle of the south wall), there would be a flight of stairs in front of you. To the left would be the living room, to the right would be the kitchen. In the back of the house would be the bedroom and bathroom. Washer and dryer would be set in a kind of alcove under the stairs. Alcove, closet, whatever you want to call it. Basically, there'd be a short, thin hallway between the back of the stairs and the wall that blocks off the bedroom and bathroom, and that's where the washing machine and dryer would be. The floor would be either wood or stone, same as the walls. I'd probably have a rug in the living room, but not carpet. I don't much like carpet. Naturally, there'd be a piano, too. An upright. Grands take up too much space and don't sound THAT much better.

Now here's the real kicker. In the middle-ish of the west wall (living room, remember?), there would be a fireplace. To the left of the fireplace, there would be a climbing wall built into the rock. It would go up and then over so you're climbing up over the fireplace, then through the floor of the second story and all the way up till you're up near the roof. About three or four feet below the ceiling of the house (the roof would be peaked too, so this would be pretty much the highest point of the house), there would be a ledge about two to three feet wide, forming a little cubby. Right over the fireplace. Several feet below, the chimney would split apart so the smoke goes around the cubby. I figure (though again, I haven't worked out whether it would work right) that would make it so the cubby is warm whenever there's a fire going. If possible, I'd put a window in the cubby too, making it a window seat.

The upstairs would be one room. There'd be a banister... fence...? kind of thing around the edge of the stairs, and another around the hole in the floor for the climbing wall. To the left of the hole for the climbing wall would be a computer desk, and to the right would be another desk, this one for reading, writing, studying, and otherwise spreading out books. The rest of the room would be devoted to bookshelves, except for a corner with a squashy couch and a few pillows and one of those really bright floor lamps.

Hmmm, while we're dreaming, let's make the upstairs a little bit smaller to make a little balcony on the north wall. On the balcony would be a rock garden. And the east wall would have another window seat, this one bigger, because most of that wall (upstairs) would be made of glass. Basically, upstairs would be devoted to reading, working, and looking out of windows to survey my vast terrain. It will be green. And set far enough away from the road that traffic noise is virtually nonexistent.

Sue says I should put a pool table upstairs. I guess that could work. I probably wouldn't have enough books to fill the entire upstairs, given that it would be almost the size of the entire downstairs. The problem is, playing pool in a room with a wall made largely of glass is never a wise idea. Especially given my style of play: Hit the cue ball as hard as you can and hope the right ball goes in. (That's a lie, but it sounded funny.) But I do enjoy playing pool. I can't deny that. Okay, nix the second window seat and the glass wall. A few windows, yes. Glass wall, no.

I was also toying with the idea of a really big telescope upstairs. The huge kind that goes through the ceiling and you have to use motorized controls to turn it. Since I'm daydreaming here, sure, let's throw that in too.

And as long as we're daydreaming.... In Disney World, there's a sidewalk with fiberoptic lights set into a stone sidewalk. At night, the fiberoptic lights turn on and it looks like you're walking on stars. That. Is. Awesome. Haven't decided yet whether that would be in the floors or the walls or the ceiling, but since we're dreaming here... I want! Haven't thought much about the rest of the lighting, but other than the floor lamp upstairs, the lights would definitely be set in the walls or ceiling somehow. I'm not a huge fan of lamps. Waste of space.

Oooo, know what else would be cool? Remember the balcony upstairs? Okay, well, there would be a big slide going down from there straight into the garage. I'm thinking the garage would be on the east side of the house, so the slide would have to curl around a bit, but I'm sure that could be managed.

Other than that and the fact that I will use a pair of crossed samurai swords as a decoration somewhere, I didn't think of anything else. There's not much storage space, and the floor plan isn't anything especially imaginative. I guess it's just fun to dream. I may come up with an idea for another house shaped more like a child's playground sometime... but not right now.


Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Quantum physics

If my ten-year-old self could see me right now, I would be so disappointed. I went to the library today and didn't even bother looking at any fantasy books. Lately, I've been gravitating more and more to the non-fiction section. Everything from physics to philosophy. Mostly physics, though. I guess Rye's babble about things like the string theory and the fourth dimension has rubbed off on me. That and an insane curiosity about quantum physics, which makes no sense from the little I understand of it. I don't see how it can be so widely accepted given how ridiculous it sounds. "Schrödinger's cat is both alive and dead at the same time" indeed....

Today I managed to come across a book called A Brief History of Time, which may be a familiar title to some of you. Apparently it's a fairly well-known book. It's about time and space and a bunch of other things people don't actually understand but try to write books about anyway. I also got The Bible According to Einstein, which looks both informative and highly amusing. "In the beginning was the reflex." Teehee. I'll let you know how that one turns out.

When I was ten, if you'd told me any book besides a fantasy book could be interesting or funny, I would have thought you were crazy.

Oh well. C'est la vie. Or however you spell it.